


Until Death

by senti_renai



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-06-03 15:57:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6616609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/senti_renai/pseuds/senti_renai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Light's death, Misa and L are left to cope with the aftermath. A presumably one-sided love can only end badly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Misa remained fixed to the spot, seemingly unable to pull herself back from the ledge that she was only a foot away from. L could only stand by and wait for her to regain her senses. 

Even from his perspective, it was understandable that she’d react so strongly towards Light’s untimely passing. Whether he was merely her fiancé or Kira, it was to her discretion. He died proving his innocence. Yet something inside told him otherwise, that he was nothing but guilty, and only wished to die leaving behind evidence that he wasn’t Kira. It was likely Misa still had something to hide. This was the worst case scenario for the world’s best detective. Though the death itself was shocking, and enough to leave both Misa and L feeling out of place.

“Miss Amane…” 

“Ryuzaki…” She mumbled softly in return. He took that as her acknowledgement of his presence. It was clear that she didn’t intend to move away from the edge of the rooftop, as she maintained her rigid posture and melancholic tone.

Without any insight into her mind, and his poor level of understanding with these situations, he was left to speculate what would be the next best move. It was unnerving how close she was to falling straight to her death, whether she was the second Kira or not. He couldn’t let a suspect escape his arrest. Not only that, but he cared for her wellbeing. 

He made a steady yet silent approach. The plan was to stay undetected, which would have been simple had she not turned to look back at him in that very second. L froze, like a deer caught in headlights. Their gazes locked with each other’s until she finally gazed back out upon the cityscape. His shoulders relaxed once again, but his slumped posture, as always, remained. 

“You shouldn’t stand so close to the edge. It’s not safe.”

The way she responded wasn’t in her usual bad tempered manner. There was something about her that made her seem calm. It was as though she was contempt with the situation.

“Like I didn’t already know…” She muttered under her breath, but clearly enough to be heard. 

Her words forced him to hesitate in thought.

“Are you going to come back inside?” Ryuzaki asked warily. 

Misa refused to answer his question and only continued to stare ahead in dead silence. From that silence alone, L understood. Though that wasn’t to say he didn’t plan to do anything about it. 

He tried to get even closer. With each step he made towards her, he could only hope that she wouldn’t bring herself closer to the ledge, and he knew what he was doing was risky, but he persisted. He made his barefoot approach, with his feet plunging into each shallow puddle that crossed his path. The rain from earlier had been what brought him to the roof. Yet when he reached the roof, the rain had subsided, and he instead found Misa.

The man was now within arm’s reach of the young woman, and she quickly became aware of this. He reached out to grab her arm.

“Ryuzaki!” Her head turned in his direction and her glare bored into him. She had wailed at him, for what had been the first time in a while, and snatched her arm away from him. Misa stumbled slightly, which brought her ever closer to the edge. 

“We’re going, Miss Amane. I’ve already told you it’s not safe.”

“Why? So I have to live another second without Light?”

“You don’t need Light, and you know yourself that he won’t be coming ba—“

“Then let me die!” She snapped.

L was startled. It hadn’t surprised him, but it was strange to see the girl act in such a way. He knew she felt strongly towards him, but never understood to what extent that was. 

He shook his head. “I can’t let you do that. You have much more to live for.”

Misa closed her eyes, only for tears to roll down her cheeks. “I miss him… just let me be with him, please…” She begged childishly. Even though he hadn’t actively done anything to stop her yet, she was acting like she had no choice but to obey him. But he knew even that may not work in his favour if she decided to fall anyway. She had nothing left to lose, in her mind.

“There’s no need for this, Amane. Let’s go….” He finally reached for her arm again, this time managing to get hold of her while she was distracted. 

A struggle proceeded between them, as L attempted to move her away from the ledge and keep his grip tightened around her wrist, and she fought to get away from him. At this rate, it was bound to end badly unless he could convince her to go with him.

“M-Misa… stop struggling… I-I have something I must tell you…”

“N-no! Let go of me!”

“Light wanted you… to know…”

Her flailing had come to a stop, yet L retained his hold and stared at her for a few seconds. It was a surprise, even to him, that his idea had actually worked on her. It didn’t take much to fool her. Already wiping her tears away, she waited for him to speak again.

“He told me that if he died, I was to protect you in his place.” He lied.

Her eyes grew wide with disbelief, and her tears seemed to subside. “H-he… he really said that?”

There was a brief pause before he continued.

“I can assure you, he did.” L nodded. “He cared for nothing more than for you to be alive and happy. And I feel very much the same.”

She furrowed her brow in thought, as though some unseen force was causing her to think. Misa stared straight into his eyes, which could mean either she was trying to figure out if he was lying, or was at a loss for words.

“So… you care about me as much as Light does?”

“Of course,” He played along, even with knowing his whole plan was based on a lie, but it was her safety that was a priority. He’d let go of her arm and now his hand was outstretched before her, waiting for her to take it. “And I wouldn’t want to disappoint him.”

Her mouth hung open in shock, and she stared at his gesture to take her hand.

“Ryuzaki, do you love me too?”

His mind stalled for a few seconds.

“Hm?”

“Well, it’s obvious. Light wants you to protect me because he knows you’re in love with me!”

“That's quite a conclusion to jump t-“

“So it’s true! He tried to tell me all along!”

He stopped speaking, and instead tried to understand what was happening. Why would Light say that to her? Either way, she’d interpreted it all wrong, and seemed to get a different message from him. But maybe… it wouldn’t be an issue to play along with this too if it would save her.

“Light… he told you? I should’ve known not to trust him!” He had to feign looking shocked. His wide-eyed expression and how close he was to Misa only made it more convincing. The tone in his voice was almost comical as he went on to pretend to deny what he’d just said. 

“I mean… Miss Amane, I-I… I think you have this all wrong! I wouldn’t admit to such a thing! Surely you believe me, right?”

Misa began smiling to herself. “Ryuzaki… you don’t need to lie about it,” She giggled, meanwhile blushing at what she was saying. “I think that’s very sweet of you… and you’re right. Light wouldn’t want me to put my life in danger.”

L didn’t respond. He glanced down at his hand, staring at it blankly for a few seconds, before Misa placed her hand in his.

“Let’s go back inside. It’s cold out here.” He muttered.


	2. Chapter 2

L sat in his chair, with the glare of the monitor being the only source of light in the desolate task force headquarters. Upon re-entering the building, Misa returned to her room. He watched on-screen as she lounged around on the sofa, reassuring himself that she wouldn’t go back to where she had been only an hour prior. He knew she wouldn’t, without a doubt. 

It wasn’t a lie when he said he was concerned for her.

Not so much for her suicidal tendencies, but for the fact that she could be Kira, or at least the second Kira. The thought was still there in the back of his mind. 

Even through her façade, she was still planning something. Her outward appearance was always deceptive, no matter what the others may have thought.

After Light’s passing – caused by a heart attack during his sleep a couple of weeks previous – L had originally been left with only the remaining members of the Kira investigation team, and Misa. Also Watari, to some extent, when he wasn’t doing his usual tasks of gathering resources and new cases for him. He was always watching from an undisclosed room, ready to help when needed. The rest of the group soon disbanded, as Soichiro Yagami grieved for his son, and the others soon followed his departure. His death had been enough to deter them from continuing the investigation. Misa, on the other hand, remained with L, and was still under his arrest.

She was now the prime suspect in assisting Kira with countless deaths, and the death of Light Yagami. He had been the original Kira. His death was nothing but a guise. It may have been his only escape from accusation, arrest, and killing Miss Amane, which would have pointed a finger at him being the murderer. 

Before leaving, the rest of the task force were determined to free Misa, but they knew better than him that she was potentially another Kira, and her fiancé’s suspected murderer. They had no ground to argue against the arrest.

He bit away at his thumbnail, and his eyes were fixed on the surveillance videos, all from varying angles of the room. Misa was in the process of flicking through TV channels aimlessly.

With constant watch being kept over her, it was a mystery as to how she could have killed Light, or how, if so, he could have killed himself. Was it planned? Unless he knew that from the moment he was suspected, he’d never escape it, and that he needed a way out. Surely they wouldn’t have known what they had coming, and he would’ve planned it before he was detained if that had been true.

Misa couldn’t have been his killer. In fact, it was more of a case that she wouldn’t. He still had his doubts to that theory, in some respect. Otherwise she wouldn’t have remained under arrest.

She was distraught when she heard the news, which came from L himself. He was the one who had witnessed the death, as he kept a close eye on Light during his sleep. That’s not what he told the others, of course. Instead he claimed that he woke up and found him that way. What he’d witnessed was unbelievable, as his heart stopped within only a few seconds, and his life was simply taken away.

Not being one to solve a case out of vengeance, he was still evermore determined to solve this one. For Yagami, Misora, and the countless victims of Kira. Even if Kira was Light himself, or Misa.

He stood up, still on his chair, before he stepped down and wandered to Misa’s room.

Maybe talking to her would get him more answers.

At this point, he’d abandoned his entire sugar-filled cup of tea.

~ 

With a polite knock on her door, he heard scuffling and a few footsteps, suggesting that he’d taken Misa by surprise in visiting. L knew he’d be paying her another visit that day but hadn’t forewarned her, and was now wondering if maybe he should have.

Despite what she was probably thinking, he heard her press her ear to the door to listen to whoever she thought was on the other side. This was surely followed by nothing but silence.

“Ryuzaki?” She called out from the other side.

“We need to talk about what I told you earlier.”

She was prompt in opening the door for him, and he knew that being straightforward with her was a much quicker way of getting more information out of her. Very much the opposite with Light.

He walked past her and took his place on the sofa, and she soon closed the door and followed behind, sitting herself next to him. Nothing was said for at least a minute or so. Misa fidgeted anxiously with her hands and seemed unsure of what to say.

“What did you mean earlier, when you said Light had already told you how I felt?”

She smiled. “He knew you liked me, and told me that’s why you’d been watching me all this time, and that you’d confessed to him. I guess I was right in calling you a pervert…”

“Perversion aside, I never mentioned a thing to Light. I lied about that.”

“Well that’s what he said to me,” She grumbled, now appearing to lose confidence in her memory as she furrowed her brow in thought, trying to recollect what he had said. It came across as uncertainty, which was believable enough. “You’re not calling me a liar, are you?”

“No, I’m not…” L mused. “But Light certainly seemed like one.”

Misa scoffed. “You’re only saying that because you’re jealous.”

He had to get into her mind. There was a lot more to uncover than whether Yagami had said anything at all to her, although it would’ve been a good indicator of his true intentions. Maybe this had been his way of throwing her off the actual investigation and keeping her nerves down, preventing the possibility of her saying anything stupid and giving away their true identities.

“Anyway, I thought I was your second Kira.”

“That isn’t going to stop me.”

“And what if it turns out I am another Kira?”

“Are you suggesting you could be Kira?”

“No!” She soon retorted. “But would you still love me if I was?”

The question was far from difficult to answer. 

“Yes.”

She let out an ear bursting squeal of excitement.

“That is soooo romantic! It almost makes me wish I was Kira…” She pondered on that thought, and soon went quiet again. Her excitement died quickly.

Initial thoughts aside, just from what she expressed, she romanticised the idea of Kira, or being Kira. L knew it wouldn’t be a far cry to say that’s what she fell for in Light. Many of these thoughts seemed to always come back to Light Yagami.

Misa had moved closer to him as she watched him think. Her silence wasn’t held for long.

“Light wouldn’t have lied to me, he must have known! And now that’s he’s no longer here, we can be together. I think that’s what he wanted, don’t you think so?”

He shot a quick glance towards her. That was out of character for Misa, and something she definitely wouldn’t say. Was this part of a plan? L shook his head, trying to shake his thoughts. 

“You aren’t trying to manipulate me are you, Amane? What happened to your love for Light? It seemed very quick to pass when earlier you were close to letting yourself go.”

“Like you said, he isn’t coming back. And if you care about me, and want to fulfil Light’s wishes, then I need to stay alive. And I can’t go on thinking about him when he’s not here...” Letting out a long sigh, she averted her eyes from him. “I want to be happy for him. That’s what he wants for me. And to prove our innocence!”

Every word she said only further denied the likelihood of her being Kira. Was she really capable of murdering Light, or other people for that matter? Maybe he’d understood her wrong. Or underestimated the chance of her wanting to be around him.  
Without warning, she placed her hand on his - which had been resting against his knee. 

“It’s really lonely without Light, Ryuzaki…”

She was now leaning closer to him, and all he could do was watch her as her features softened, and once again disappeared into her thoughts. Her head was now against his shoulder. Her breathing was steady and her hand seemed to tighten on his, before she curled her legs up next to her.

“I miss him too.” He muttered. That certainly wasn’t a lie.

And neither were his feelings for Misa.

Staring up at him for a couple of seconds, they kept their eyes locked with each other’s.

Lifting her head from his shoulder, she pressed for him to move onto his back. They only continued to stare at each other until he found himself resting on his elbows, laying down lengthways across the sofa with her in complete control.  
It was a new experience for him, but he’d seen enough romance movies to know what she was doing. And various other kinds of video footage, which he’d prefer not to mention.

Misa leaned in, and finally pressed her lips to his. He could only presume he was doing right in returning the gesture and letting his lips softly graze against hers. Nothing had ever made him feel the way he did in that moment, but he was unsure what he would have called it even if he had.

Despite what he felt, there was a thought that wouldn’t leave his mind.

If she was Kira, then she’d already won.


	3. Chapter 3

L entered the heavily air-conditioned room only to glance around what was then an empty room. Computer monitors lined the back wall, with only few of them remaining turned on, the rest were blank screens, one of which he caught a glimpse of his own reflection in.

He couldn’t bring himself to understand what had happened. Did he always make such naïve mistakes? Surely not. He stared thoroughly at the monitors as he began biting his nails once again.

All the footage for Misa’s room was nowhere in sight. The monitors displaying the surveillance from her room were turned off. Watari was nowhere to be found, and it seemed that he’d been wise enough to give him the privacy, even if it was dangerous or life-threatening to do so.

“Ryuzaki.” 

The familiar voice came from behind, just as he’d been expecting, but there was a certain tone about it that seemed almost sympathetic – as though he knew exactly what was wrong. L glanced over his shoulder, only to be met by Watari’s comforting expression.

The nail biting had ceased and he resumed looking over each of the screens. “It seems I’ve made quite a mistake, Watari.” 

~

He lay awake in Misa’s bed, staring up at the ceiling. The woman was nowhere to be found when he woke up. Never had he been so easily deceived, but it became apparent that this time he’d let his feelings get in the way of his judgements, and he knew what she was trying to do all along. There must have been some plan to try and impair his thoughts.

She had, however, returned to find him in that same position of actually laying down in bed; a sight which she’d probably only just came to behold in that moment.  
It was as though he couldn’t bring himself to sit in his usual manner.

Yet absolutely nothing had changed. She was happy. Her playful hum could be heard as she leaned against the doorway, and when he finally looked up, she smiled. Her true intentions hidden by her sweet little game.  
L refused to allow his thoughts to show through and could only stare at her blankly. If he went along with her, and tried to act relatively normal, he might just be able to work a way out of the situation.  
Her smile formed into a pout when he showed no intention of smiling back. 

Pacing over to him, she climbed up on the bed and sat on his lower abdomen, maintaining her pout, and leaned in closer to his face as though she was trying to prove a point of being unhappy. One of few things he didn’t enjoy seeing.  
When he didn’t react, she sulked even more. A frown had now worked its way in. 

“Aren’t you happy to see me, Ryuzaki?” She mused.

There wasn’t a chance of him letting up. He remained silent, contemplating what to do next. Misa huffed at him, folding her arms across her chest tightly, which was very much childlike. He could only watch as she continued. She was showing no remorse for what she was doing, and appeared to not care in the slightest about Light. Almost like she’d forgotten about him entirely.

L muttered under his breath, before addressing Misa.

“Do you think Light would have wanted this?” 

The confusion on her face only complicated things. It gave him nothing to work with.

He began again, rephrasing his question. “Would Light be happy with our affair?”

This time she seemed annoyed that he’d even asked, which did seem genuine, but tried to brush it off with a response centred around what she wanted, and what he wanted for her.

“Well… I’m happy, and that’s all that matters, right?”

Silence fell between them again, and he knew it was just another lie that she fabricated. She wasn’t happy, and surely couldn’t be happy with him, and was only using him to get the information she needed. With every similar answer she gave, it became much more difficult to believe.  
Now he found himself shaking his head at her, but she soon unfolded her arms and tried to work one of her hands into his, which lay motionless by his side. His fingers subconsciously slipped between hers.

One questioned lingered in his mind, although it wasn’t exactly relevant to the case. He needed to know.

He lowered his voice to whisper. “Do you still love Light, Misa?”

Avoiding her questions and getting her worked up did seem to work wonders when he wanted something useful out of her, but that wasn’t his initial intention in asking.

“I-I…” Misa glanced down at her hand pressed against L’s chest, and her grip on his other hand became lose. He could sense her doubt, but that could have easily been a lie too, much like everything else she’d said to him. “I don’t know.”

That answer wasn’t enough for him. Sitting upright, he slung Misa onto the other side of the bed, causing her to squeal, and now had her trapped under him, placing his arms at either side of her to hold her in place. There were only inches between them, and she gasped in surprise as he moved closer.

“Then I’ll make you love me, Miss Amane.”

~

Not only had he made the mistake once, but twice. Now he knew for certain that there was nothing to prevent his death. He only wished she could have fallen for him, as that might have put a stop to what he knew would eventually happen. L could sleep with her and confess his love all he wanted, and that still did nothing to affect her feelings or intentions towards him, despite her soft-hearted nature. 

She was only focused on what Light wanted, and the only love she had was for him.

He’d returned to watch the recorded surveillance on his computer. From the moment they kissed, and where things went from there in a ridiculously short amount of time. Even then, he knew it was dangerous, and that she was only getting close enough to bring his guard down. But he knew better. 

It was unclear why he went along with it. He may have been attracted to her, but he wasn’t foolish, and knew what that meant. When he told Misa he’d still love her if she was Kira, it wasn’t a lie. But he knew she was lying with everything she said, and he let it happen.  
Maybe he was ready for death if it meant taking down Kira once and for all. And if the girl he loved was Kira. It almost made him understand how Misa felt towards Light.

It wasn’t worth living if you lost what you’d always wanted.

But she didn’t love him. She loved Light, who now it seems didn’t love her back.

The Kira investigation had forced them into this cat and mouse situation. They wouldn’t have met, hadn’t it been for L’s own investigation.

His eyes had drifted from the monitors. When he looked back up at them, they resumed their usual state of recording the events in Misa’s room, to which he found she’d gone. And this time, he knew where to look for her.

~

He’d made it back to the roof again, and as expected, had found Misa in exactly the same place. This time, his heart hammered away in his chest as he watched her stand unnervingly close to the edge. 

Despite what he knew, he tried to stop her. 

Love was the most dangerous killer of them all. 

Stopping just behind her, he waited in silence. She turned to look at him, and offered him her hand, mirroring what he’d done to her the previous day.

“Come with me, Ryuzaki...” She begged, which soon resulted in her getting worked up. “You already suspect me being the second Kira… there’s no way you’ll let me be free, even if we love each other!”

The man could only stare at her hand, then back up at her eyes, before he took her hand and joined her on the edge of the building. If he was going to die, then he should at least take Kira down with him. And he had all his answers. The case was solved. 

Misa was definitely the second Kira.

“I know you don’t love me, Misa. But I’d rather you leave this world knowing that I loved you. More than Light ever could.”

It was a rare moment where he could finally speak of his feelings.

That alone could have saved him, as Misa watched him in awe. But at this point it was too late to turn back. She intended to kill him here, though he wouldn’t lose. He could rid the world of Kira, but he couldn’t stop being in love with Kira.

“I’ll happily go down with you.”

Turning to look at Misa one final time, gaining nothing but a look of shock from her. She clearly hadn’t expected what was about to happen.

He took a step forward, bringing her with him.

And that was the day the Kira case was closed.

No more Kira.

Or so he thought. 

And no more L to save the world.


End file.
